addiction, alcohol, experience, recovery, sobriety, the middle

Addiction

I am unsure of how I got to this position in my life.  How one day or if it was multiple days built up.  I have lost relationships to this disease called addiction and I fear more will be lost if I do not do something.  I read quotes by people who said “I would never have reached my full potential if I didn’t get sober.”  And I could not relate more to that.  I have those thoughts daily.  I do believe I will beat this disease, I can envision my life without alcohol.  I can see how happy I will be one day when I can say I am, 30 – 60 -90 days sober.  I had my 27th birthday last week and I cannot be more determined to make this year better than the last.  This will be the year that changes my life.  I have started a new career path to build a life for myself and while I know I will one day be successful in it, I feel as though I cannot give it my all because of this disease.  Something needs to change and something needs to give before this disease kills me.

16 thoughts on “Addiction

  1. I don’t think you need to be told that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain in sobriety and recovery.

    I sincerely hope you find the plan/system/program that works for you. Please reach out if I or anyone else in this greater recovery community can offer support/insight or just an understanding sounding board.

  2. I thought I had missed my chance at fulfillment during my drinking days.
    Now, sober and 43, I see nothing but possibility. Life is beautiful.

    Don’t give addiction any more of you time.

    1. Thank you for the words. While very difficult I truly believe life will be drastically better without it. Looking back I hope to one day say I beat this and be proud of that.

      1. It is so bizarre. I didn’t anticipate life would be better. I honestly thought it would suck. To have to actually experience boring life.

        I have been shocked at how wrong I was.

      2. I can only imagine. To read everyone’s stories and see how their lives have so dramatically improved. I really look forward to that. When your head is such a mess for so long it is hard to see clearly.

    2. Could someone please advise me of how they got help getting sober. I’m not sure where to start. Feeling a tad lost and know I need help with this dependence I’m having with wine. Thank u.

      1. Hi Louise,

        I really wish I could help you with this. Sadly I am in the same boat of fighting addiction. I hear a lot of “one day at a time”, asking for support etc. I encourage you to read blogs, some good ones are “tired of thinking about drinking” and “unpickled”. Best of luck!

      2. My path was relatively unconventional to say nothing of naïve.

        I used therapy, reading (about addiction,) writing (about myself,) and isolation during the first 9 months.

        I’d now recommend finding a meeting (AA/SMART/SOS/etc.) and a therapist that feel reasonably comfortable. Then use both as openly and honestly as you can.

        And write. Again, being as honest as you possibly can with yourself about yourself.

  3. I was paralyzed by addiction for years and i wanted to do all these things and I was not able to do… I would forget or they would just fall by the waist side. When I got sober, life was pretty scary at first, I can’t lie. But when I compare now to how I used to live, it’s really hard to believe – it’s a complete 360.

    You can do this! Find some good support (there is a huge list on my site) because that will be very helpful; it is pretty hard to get sober on your own.

    And don’t drink one day at a time! Sending hugs.

    1. Thank you so much! I am truly praying to get a hold of this. I know the other side is so much better and brighter. I have basically wasted 5 months of barely working and it needs to stop. I can do this – I know I can!

  4. I think we’re in the same place in our lives. Please feel free to call on me for support, I might not be much use for good advice yet, because I’m in the first steps of my journey too – but perhaps we can encourage each other. I’m sure life must be better on the other side of this and I believe you can do it x

  5. I really hope and pray for you. I am in relapse but going to a meeting. I also take naltrexone which helps to stop drinking. Wish you all the best

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s