I see you week 3

Please bare with me everyone. I am trying to remain positive about this whole thing, but I am starting to have some thoughts that I am not quite sure what to do with. Keep in mind as the title mentions I am only on week 2 – so maybe all this will suppress with time… but I sit here again on Friday as the weekend fast approaches.  I am on day 12 – nearly through week 2, and week 3 is in my foresight.  I am still having a hard time wrapping my head around all this.  St. Patty’s Day is coming up (yes, I am Irish) and so is April Fools Day (my bday – no, I’m not kidding) and while I know drinking is not REQUIRED, it is something I want to do.  I want to go out on those days and have a green beer – have a glass of wine with dinner.  Get smashed?!  No.  I don’t need to do that.  But I wish to enjoy those things on those days.  I went into this wanting to really cut back on the amount of alcohol I consumed as well as the frequency.  I never thought going into this that it would be “Forever”.  Am I going to drink today or this weekend, nope.  I have no reason to and I know that.  But I would really like to get to the point of drinking for special occasions. I am not talking about drinking frequently – more like once a month or once every two months – or first experiences type of things. I came into this wanting to learn balance, control, and discipline.  I was living my life recklessly before and being away from alcohol even for a short period of time has put that into perspective for me.