addiction, alcohol, experience, recovery, sobriety, the middle

Just A Piece

Where am I.
This is not the me I use to know.
At some point I took a wrong turn.
The point of that turn is unknown.

My heads a mess and I can’t think straight.
I don’t know how I got here in the first place.
This position we r in was never my intention.
I just started crying and then it happened.

Was it subconscious?
Was it assumptive?
So many questions,
To which I don’t have the answer.

Writing was always an outlet.
But as I sit here, I struggle to type.
The emotions have been blocked for so long.
I think they may even be gone.

Blocking emotions with booze, denial and silence.
Hoping never to acknowledge or feel the pain.
Even blocking the inner words of myself.
These are the things that have led me here today.

3 thoughts on “Just A Piece

  1. Beautiful. And I have felt exactly that way.

    The emotions will return. It’s all so strange and scary. But worth it.

    First step. Stop questioning it all for now. Forget about why. Just don’t drink.

    That’s it. You can work in the rest later.

    Big hug

    Anne

  2. Awareness is 75% of the battle. You’ve come so far and you are finding doors. They will open soon, and there will be light and peace behind them. Hugs.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s