addiction, alcohol, recovery, sobriety, the middle

Day 2

Hello Blog-isphere.

Today is Day 2 of what I hope to be my road to recovery from a very LONG and exhausting battle with alcohol.  It’s been about 4 years of heavy drinking.  Started with about 2 bottles a night as I finally got out of a toxic and tumultuous relationship and has since come down to about 3-4 glasses a night which is now my norm during the week.  The weekends however, wow, another level.

I am unsure of what came over me this past November, but that is when I finally had a… “omg something has to be done. I can’t continue to live life this way” moment.  I contemplated living 2014 sober.. sadly was not the case as you can see.  Going into 2014 I was trying out only “Social” drinking for a couple weeks.  So no drinking at home/alone and only during outing with friends.  Went about 6 days of no alcohol which is a MILESTONE in the past 4 years of my life.  However that “only social” drinking lasted all of about two-three weeks.  I am back up to drinking about 5-6 days. I do not have that, “only stop after one” mentality that most people have so sadly even social drinking brought me back to my unhealthy habits.

This past weekend of getting drunk alone at home because “I was bored” I woke up on Monday wanting to be completely done. I laid in bed wide awake from 2-6 am just coming down from my drunkeness and did nothing but google “quit drinking” and read articles, and blog after blog of women who were are one point in a similar situation as I was in. One particular caught my eye – a blogger by the name – Unpickled. After reading almost every one of her blogs that morning – here I am! Wanting so badly to change and hoping that writing and seeking the help of others will get me through what at this time- seems to be impossible!

17 thoughts on “Day 2

  1. Hi just wishing you the best of luck …. I am at a similar point with alcohol …im now threee days in taking one day at a time !

    1. Hi! Thank you so much for the feedback – Wishing you the best as well! Comes a time when you just got to move on ya know 🙂 Happy to hear you are taking it one day at a time!

  2. Hello! I can’t claim to be a woman ;o) but, apart from that, we’re in the same sort of boat …. We even have the same (ex?)-“poison” in common!
    You do absolutely right to take anything and everything from the blogs out here. You’ll always find something that chimes loudly and, even on the rare occasions when you don’t, you’ll never be short of encouragement! :o)
    I’m on Day 41 without the “Sauv” and I know what your Day 2 and Day 3 “look and feel like”…. LOADS of people out here do…. THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of people!
    You’re not on your own with it!
    Congrats on making the leap and keep on rolling! It’s worth it! :o)
    G x

    1. Hahaha woman or not – Congratulations on day 41!!! 😉
      That’s amazing! I look forward to the day I can say that! 🙂 and thank you for the kind words and encouragement – it’s much appreciated! It’s amazing how different one can feel with the blogging and support of others on here. 🙂

      1. Yep! That’s the idea! :o)
        All you have to do is hang a thought out there and someone will help with the weight :o)

  3. I love(d) me some sauv, too. I have been right where you are, a LOT of times. (On day 2, that is.) This sober blogging community is really an enormous help! On my fourth try of Belle’s 100 day challenge at tiredofthinkingaboutdrinking on day 27 today. Keep writing and reading, it helps! xo

    1. Thank you so much for the feedback! I started her program too!!!!! Heard so many good things! Now on day 11! 100 seems like a lifetime away. So until then – i just have today. haha, today i will be sober. I look forward to following your blog!

      1. Good job, 11 days! I am nervous, after today it will be the longest I’ve ever stayed sober (27 was my previous record). I can feel the temptation to “be moderate” creeping back in now that I’ve “proved myself.” Just trying to remember how much headspace this whole process is taking up and that if I start over again, I’ll have to suffer through this first bit all over again too, and it’s hard!! So yeah, with you on “today.” That’s all I can think about!

      2. Ugh I know. I have that “proved myself” feeling daily. Not sure 100 days will stick. But as long as we get back up and keep moving forward – we’ll get there!

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